Break-ups are the worst, amiright? One day, they are all up in your life, and the next they are gone. We know that when a relationship ends before you are ready for it to end, it can feel like a punch in the stomach. Whilst you might want to be scrolling through their Insta stories or lurking somewhere on their twitter feed, but this is not the best way to handle it. We got your back, with these top 10 tips for getting over someone and getting back to your badass boss self. In the immortal words of Little Mix, they made your heart break, and it made you who you are.
1) Get off social media
It might seem tempting to not only lurk in their feed for a few days, but trust us, this is a bad idea. Similarly, you might want to get out and start posting everything fun you do all over Insta and TikTok. The thing with this is that you are still doing everything in your life for their benefit. If you are out having a good time, live in the moment for a while with friends and family, and take them out of the equation entirely. That way, you can get back to having genuine fun and will almost definitely get them out of your head.
2) Unfollow them and their pals
Just like the above, social media is probably going to be a foe rather than a friend at the moment, especially of you follow them and their mates. Do a big unfollow of everyone, or at least hide them from your feed if you don’t want them to realise that you’ve removed them from view. That way, you can carry on scrolling through Insta when you want to, and not have their lives and possibly pictures with new partners destroying all your progress.
3) Spend some quality time for you
Take a breather from the whole situation and escape into something you love. Whether that’s through video games, art, sports, movies, a good book, yoga or a bit of self-care, you will feel better for dealing with you. It might have been a while since you’ve had the chance to do some of the stuff you love as well, so getting back into it now will be a great distraction.
4) Hit the gym
Need a distraction from the whole situation? Go and hit the gym or pound the pavement. The repetitive motion of exercising this way is a great way to clear your head, and the effects of the exercise will boost your mood too.
5) Surround yourself with wonderful people
This is a no brainer, but hang out as much as possible with the people that make you feel great, and that will make you feel like yourself. See your best friends, do something fun and new and make some memories. Chill out with your family with a roast dinner and board games. Basically, do the wonderful things in life with people that have been your ride or die for years. If there is anything will take your mind off the ex, it’s being around the best people in your life.
6) Write down all the reasons why you are better off
The best way to stop a backslide that might end in the same heartbreak few months down the line is to have a think about all the reasons why you broke up, and how your life can be completely fierce without them in it. Remember, you were a whole person before they came into your life, and you can go back to being that awesome human being again now that you are single.
7) Give your friends your phone
The rebound dial. Sliding into their DMs. WhatsApping them at 4am when you can’t sleep and it seems like a good idea. Whatever your method is, the phone could well be your enemy right now. Give to a trusted friend for a few days to keep safe or, if you can’t hand over your actual phone, give your friend your ex’s number and then delete them from everywhere on your phone and socials. That way, you can still use the number if you really need to, just when you are out of the woods.
8) Make changes for you
So, there might be the very strong urge right now for a radical post-break-up haircut, tattoo or piercing. Maybe you’re thinking now might be the time to enter a new era of wardrobe. The most important thing to remember, if this has crossed your mind, is that you should be making these changes for you, and not in response to the break-up. There’s nothing wrong with reinventing yourself, just make sure it’s for the right reasons.
9) Plan the next stages of your life
Knowing you can crack on without them in your life is half the battle of getting over someone. Take a moment to sit down with a cuppa and map out the next year or two of your life. Going to uni? Sitting exams? Moving away? Maybe you are just spending the next year being the best friend you can be to all your pals. Whatever your plans, get them down on paper and look at how wonderful your life is going to be.
10) Know it’s OK to miss them
Whilst you might want to put it all behind you, it’s important to know that it’s totally OK to miss them. It’s OK to not be OK right now, and when you need time to have a cry, give yourself the space to do that.
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